Daily Snark: All kinds of legal woes

Posted by Colleen McKie Categories: Celebrities

Rihanna is served
Rihanna has been subpoenaed to testify against Chris Brown in his June 22nd trial.  For a while it was thought that Rihanna would refuse to testify against Brown.  But now that she has been seen out and about snuggling with Canadian rapper and actor Aubrey “Drake” Graham I have a feeling that she’s a lot more open to testifying.

Paris Hilton takes the cheesy way out
Paris Hilton has broken up with boyfriend Doug Reinhardt.  Or rather, Hilton’s publicist has.  The heiress decided to take the tacky road and reportedly had her publicist end the relationship. And then released an official statement to People magazine.

Hey, at least she didn’t dump him on Twitter.

Michael Lohan okay with Daughter’s reconciliation for now
Seems like Lilo’s dad Michael is okay with her getting back with Sam Ronson.

Bet that’s a load off her mind.

Pete Doherty arrested
Sometime musician and constant coke head Pete Doherty has been arrested for DUI and drug possession in Gloucester, England. This follows last Friday’s arrest in Switzerland for doing heroin on a plane.

You going for some kind of record, Pete?  Why not try staying sober for more than a day?

Alba without a spine
Jessica Alba was caught on camera plastering shark posters all over Oklahmoa city as part of a protest of some kind of protest.  Shortly after the actress issued a formal apology.

“I got involved in something I should have had no part of. I realize that I should have used better judgment, and I regret not thinking things through before I made a spontaneous and ill-advised decision to let myself get involved with the people behind this campaign.”

Way to protest, Jessica. For a second there I thought you were more than an actress whose main concern his how much money she makes.  My bad.

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Daily Snark: Jessica Simpson works the fat angle

Posted by Colleen McKie Categories: Celebrities

Aren’t her 15 minutes up, yet?
In a desperate bid to hold on to even a smidgen of her celebrity, Jessica Simpson is slated to appear in another reality TV show. Apparently the new show, Price of Beauty, will have Jess and a friend travelling the country looking for beautiful people and what makes them beautiful.

The idea for the show came form Jess’ recent weight struggle.  Just one more travesty caused by high-waisted Mom jeans.

Lindsay’s dad still a douche bag
Michael Lohan was arrested earlier this month for threatening to kill fiancée Erin Muller and then himself when she tried to put an end to the relationship.
Guys like this tick me off.  Why not do us females a favor and forget about the first part of the threat?  We really don’t care about the second part all that much.

White wedding
Meg White from the White Strips married boyfriend Jackson Smith.  Also married were Dead Weather and the Raconteur bassist Jack Lawrence.  The weddings took place at the Nashville home of Jack White, Meg’s band mate and ex husband. Benjamin “Swank” Smith officiated.

What was there no minister named Jack available? 

Kanye is SMRT
Despite the fact that he has “written” a book, Kanye West doesn’t believe in reading. 

“I am not a fan of books. I would never want a book’s autograph. I am a proud non-reader of books. I like to get information from doing stuff like actually talking to people and living real life.”

Just for the record Kanye?  Books don’t give autographs, authors do.

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